Kate Rives Rodney & Liz Clifton Interview Transcription:
Liz Clifton: Welcome to the wonderful, wonderful Kate Rives Rodney. She is living a toxin-free life and is an Arbonne brand ambassador. Thank you so much for joining us today.
Kate Rives Rodney: Thank you so much for having me Liz.
Liz Clifton: Oh, absolutely. My pleasure. Yeah, it's been great. You know, we've had some connection over the time, so yeah. Perfect. Very excited for the interview.
Kate Rives Rodney: Me too.
Liz Clifton: So we're gonna, kickoff, what does self-care mean for you?
Kate Rives Rodney: As a first time, mom, I would actually say because I've really understood the difference recently of self care and not spending the time doing self-care. And to me, it's just taking time for yourself and I don't mean just, you know, doing skin get morning ritual of skincare and evening. I actually mean, reading a personal development book, reading any book and just having to set 10 50 minutes where you're nourishing your brain. It's also looking after your health and I don't mean that you can't have chocolate and wine when you fancy it. But it's also making sure that you're fuelling your body is the best it can be. And so self-care is really just taking care of yourself and having the time for yourself. Because I swear, when I, for example, I start every morning with a meditation. And when I don't have the option to do that, because I say, I say every morning, but let's be honest, mum, life is not always that way. When I don't, I'm I'm, off-kilter all day. It's such a, such a little thing, but it's so key to my mental health. And I think a lot of people think self-care is there any art, not artificial, but only, you know, on the skin or whatever. But it's actually, for me, it's physical and mental health as well and truly important.
Liz Clifton: You are. So important! Yeah, I love that. so there's a few things that I'm gonna go deeper into with you. but you mentioned that you check in with yourself like physically and mentally every day. Do you also kind of check on yourself with emotions and so spiritually as well?
Kate Rives Rodney: Not, so much spiritually, but definitely emotionally in that. And I think this is where it's really important to have personal development, because something that I noticed as a, as a first time mum in that, so for about past two years, when I started my Arbonne business, I suddenly understood about personal development. Like the first step was actually read The Secret, which was just before I started my album business, actually. And what's interesting is that someone recommended me this to be The Secret 10 years ago and I just went, oh, this is airy-fairy stuff, not me. Then I read it. And my mind was blown about how important your thoughts are and it's, it's things like that. So for me, checking in emotionally is all part and parcel with personal development. And I found it really interesting that as a new mom, as, as deeply an absolutely incredibly I wanted this baby and I love it.
Kate Rives Rodney: I'm so grateful for every day is very easy to get overwhelmed. And so just spending a couple of minutes, just writing down my thoughts, my gratitude, in my gratitude journal. But also being aware of when the overwhelm is getting too much and being able to go, Nope, I need a breath. And that is due to personal development. It's not, and it's something that it can't happen overnight. It takes time to build up that growth as it were. And, you know, so yeah, I'd say emotionally being aware is incredibly important because if you let your emotions and your thoughts overrule you, and then you can, you can be floundering very, very easily.
Liz Clifton: I love that. Thank you. And thank you for sharing so openly as well. Kate Rives Rodney: Yeah. I think it's important.
Kate Rives Rodney: And I remember thinking that in my fertility journey, like so many women, don't talk about how difficult it is to conceive. In the age, the society that we're living in now, because of all the stress and the pressure that we're under. And all the chemicals and pollution that we breathe in every day and there's far more, I'm sure there were far more couples experienced, unexplained, unexplained infertility. Or have problems. but don't talk about it. And I've just, I've always been extremely open from the get go pretty much. I think after about the first year when I started feeling myself alone. I was like, nah, this is no no no. I need to talk about it. And since then I've been extremely open. And I think it's, I hope that other people will start doing it too. Because I think anyone who's struggling with any mental health issue or, or struggling in any area in their life, keeping it bottled in just makes it worse.
Kate Rives Rodney: Like I had another, I get I'm being extremely open, but then that's me. I remember like my first boyfriend said to me when he was describing me to someone, oh yeah, Kate's like an open book, but it's a book that's like jammed open. Because I just say, I just, I just say everything that goes on in my mind. I actually lost my dad really quickly to cancer, 6.5 years ago. And, and that completely you know rocked my world. And I was just all over the place. And I did everything that you shouldn't do. I just I literally went into a little huddle and I just hid away from everybody. And I just got in my dark little place in my mind. Not just I say to myself where we were living, but I was also in my mind. I was very much like I'm not seeing anybody.
Kate Rives Rodney: And I, and I always lived in a lot of friends and people. And, I think then when I started to come out of my shell. I realized what a dangerous place that I'd been in and that it was important to be out and talking and sharing. So then since then, because I had those few years and I was not being open and not sharing things. And I suddenly realized, no no , that's not me. I need to be open and share because when you're going through grief. Yeah, it's really, it's, it's horrible. But, going through it alone in your head is the worst, you know.
Liz Clifton: Oh, thank you so much. You are so open and it's so appreciated. Because just like you said, as we open up and we share, we first, we'll let other people know. They're not the only people that feel like that. You know, we all have moments where we've gone through like traumas and tragedies and we do pull into ourselves and so you being open and sharing that story. I know we support so many people. So I'm so grateful thank you. It will. Yeah.
Kate Rives Rodney: Good. I think, yeah. Again, I think if I, if my story in any way can give, give some hope, that you can get you out on the other side of the tunnel, then, and that's why I, yeah, I'm very open. I think it's important to share. Yeah.
Liz Clifton: That's beautiful. Like a problem set a problem. Halved, at least we've had someone else's problem. It helps us release as well at the same time. Yeah. Thank you. Bless you. See giving back, a little bit before, too, when you were speaking about meditating, and you've also mentioned about journaling. So what have you experienced has been with both of them if you can think about how you started and then how it's developed over the time?
Kate Rives Rodney: I'd say guided meditation all the way. I still can't sit and just breathe without thinking. I find that still so difficult. So I love, there's an app called insight timer and it's free. And they you just got so many amazing meditations. so I absolutely love just plugging one in, and just breathing. But yeah, at the beginning, Ooh. Like now, you know, you get, I mean, I say in like a 10 minute meditation, that was probably, only a few minutes while I'm properly meditating. but I know at the beginning, I'd say those first 10, 15 minutes, it wasn't any real meditating. Cause it was just every time my brain was starting, oh, I need to do this or, oh, I need to do that. And it's understanding that you just need to let those thoughts go through you and not, you know, pinpoint, not get, not attach yourself to them, but it is hard.
Kate Rives Rodney: So yeah, I say guided meditation all the way or the other thing is that, which I absolutely love is again, something that we started as a, in my Arbonne team. We started about a year and a half ago. It's called Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod an amazing man. And I love that book, and doing the miracle morning massively helps me, be better at meditation and gratitude journaling. Because he actually says in his book one great tip is having an accountability buddy. And so I thoroughly recommend that when starting off, because I remember some mornings I was like, yeah, yes. Get up, or sleep for another hour. You know, like, you know, it's difficult to force yourself up in the morning to do a bit of self-care i.e. meditation, affirmations, gratitude journal, and, you know, reading something, something to nourish your mind.
Kate Rives Rodney: And I love that book from his, because I actually did it with my best friend. Who's got nothing to do with my album businessmen that, but I knew that she was also struggling with getting up in the morning and getting started on the right foot. So we, we did it as an accountability buddy. And it was great because whenever she was getting, there were mornings when she was like, I don't want to get up, but I'd have to tell Kate that I'm not getting up. Because I've known her, her entire life. She's known me my entire life by one month because I am exactly one month older than her. So there is absolutely no way we can lie to each other and say, oh yeah, I did it. No, she'd know. And I'd know that it, you know, and it's actually quite interesting because we often, cause he said, it's like to make habit takes 30 days.
Kate Rives Rodney: And the first 10 days you're really excited. Cause you're doing a new thing and going yeah yeah, look at me. Look at me the second, 10 days or when it's, when you want to basically quit and you want to give up and those second 10 days, yeah, we did have a couple of mornings when we had to admit you to each other, we did not get up in time and we had to do it really rushed in 15 minutes rather than an hour. So you do a two minute meditation, you quickly read your affirmations to yourself, write three sentences in your gratitude journal. And then you're like, doing some star jumps. you know, you can do it in 15 minutes, but it's not advisable. And, I, yeah, but then the second, the third, 10 days when you got over that hump, as it were, you're feeling better, you're like, yes, this does, this does help.
Kate Rives Rodney: This does make a difference. And like I was, I did it every morning. Even when pregnant, I think I only stopped in my last month of pregnancy. And then since it's been 11 months and then there've been times when my baby is slept really quite well. So I'm like getting up for the miracle morning, going to do it with my team. We do a group one now, before I was doing it alone. But now we do as a group one. And it's brilliant because you have different people and different meditations and different people hosting and it's different accents and different vibes. And I love it. Yeah, no, you have to be up for it. And so there are times and I'm, I want to do it, but then if I'd been woken up three or four times in the night. I'm like, no I'm going to use this hour to sleep.
Kate Rives Rodney: That's more important than I do my own when I wake up through insight timer. And, and yet the gratitude journal, it is really difficult to do because it's one of those things you can so easily say to it tomorrow. I'll do it tomorrow. It's fine. Or I just think them in my head. But the actual act of writing them, I swear, makes it more powerful and you actually start feeling good. And there I'd advice is for anyone going through any kind of like relationship strain. Because I mean with our fertility journey, there was a lot of stress in our relationship. And I remember best my best friend said, why don't you I told her I was struggling, was like, just write one thing. You're grateful for your husband for, in your three things that you're grateful for. Yeah, I can do that.
Kate Rives Rodney: I can do, I can think of one thing I'm sure. And then, and then it evolved. I had, I was thinking of three things I was grateful for in my life, three things I was grateful for in my husband and then three things I was grateful for in my business. So that you can kind of like take it further. And I thoroughly recommend that. Cause even like, I'd say now, I recently started this again with a good friend and basically ending the evening. And this is a really great tip for any new mom out there. Get another accountability, buddy. That's also in the same place as you and I had this close friend who gave birth a couple of months after me. And we started messaging each other every night, giving us giving each other three things we're proud of from our day. You know, something we've done. There've been times when, and what I've said is I'm proud. I've breathed I can't think of anything else. I'm proud I breathed today.
Kate Rives Rodney: You know, I was proud of it. And and also one thing we're grateful for our husbands for, because what I've noticed at first-time moms is that every mum seems to complain pretty much about the same thing about the husbands and dads in our lives. Which is that they're not mind readers and we wish they were. And so just thinking of one thing I'm grateful for as well. Oh, he smiled at us today or something like that. Oh, he didn't. And I don't mind if he didn't dishwasher, he didn't do this. He didn't do that. So he smiled at us today ending that on a positive note, instead of ending the evening on a negative note. But it does take time. And so my biggest tip is actually, yeah, accountability, buddy. Get somebody in the same kind of area as you some like not area because it can be online. But at the same kind of place in your life. And then, you know, you as each other, as accountability buddies.
Liz Clifton: I love it. Thank you. Yeah. That is a brilliant top tip. And I think, again, it's picking up that actually you aren't the only person that situation and to have that other person they can go, oh yeah, I, Hey, I felt exactly the same today. Yep. I got you. We can do it together. And just finding that one little thing and breathing's important. So I'm proud of you for breathing. Okay. And keep it up. Okay. So I have another question for you. We're getting towards the end of the questions. How do you celebrate your wins?
Kate Rives Rodney: I jump up and down. I literally go woohoo!
Kate Rives Rodney: And I shout it to the world. I literally, I just, I go, yeah, I, I like messaging my mom friends or, you know, oh, I just manage this because I think it can be very British. And as I've noticed, here it's very French also to kind of, you know, not celebrate your wins. And, you're doing yourself a disservice. Why not have a jump up and down and have a like, look at me. I feel good about myself. I feel happy. I mean, enjoy it. and I think those moments, they really lift you up for, you know, cause it's not every second of every day, that's like that. So make the most of it.
Liz Clifton: And a final question relating to yourself care. What is your favourite happy place Your favourite kind of joyful place?
Kate Rives Rodney: Oh, so difficult. Cause it's weird. I was recently, yeah. Okay. I've got one place. I can't go, but it's in my mind, in my happy case, in my mind as when my grandparents were still alive and it was in their country, home country had their home in the country and there was this little, like this little sheltered place in a garden. And it was just, I love that, that little of their garden and I can still picture it completely, perfectly. And so in meditation and they say, go to your happy face, go to your peaceful place. That's my place. Otherwise. my happy place, that's pretty much my bed. That sounds really bad, but I love reading in my bed. I love, I often do my meditations in my bed and, and now, so yeah, I didn't ever think I would be a co-sleeping mama. But basically when my baby, starts waking up around midnight 1:00 AM. I give up trying to put her in her car again. And I just take her into bed with me and we have snuggles and she sleeps a lot better and I sleep a lot better as well. So now I love that like our little cuddles in my bed. So yeah, my bed is definitely my happy place.
Liz Clifton: Oh, I love it that's beautiful. And I think, yeah, these, those cuddles with a baby a it's like. It's the most natural love that you can have. Isn't it so, Yeah. That's beautiful. Thank you. Took me right back to when mine were little, then.
Kate Rives Rodney: It's something so far, for like, I know so many people, I shouldn't have them contact nothing on, you must put them down or like I get it from my mother-in-law. I get it from my mother. I get it. My husband everyone's sending me, put her down, put her down. I waited four point five years, for this miracle. And already tomorrow she's 11 months. How did that happen So if I want to spend half an hour, an hour, an hour and a half having a cuddle with her, but especially now that she's decided that walking is the new fun game. So she is never still, she's never sitting. The only time I get a cuddle now is when she's napping and I love them. I absolutely adore them. So yeah, if it's great. And I don't think that my husband and family, they realize this, but I actually get my most productive, I get loads done on my business because it's on my phone. So I can have her on me and enjoy the chat and be in a really happy place while I'm working on my business. So it's oh, it's not, I'm not doing it. I'm not doing the housework.
Liz Clifton: Yeah. They're definitely more priority there.
Kate Rives Rodney: Yeah, exactly. I'm sorry, housework. I'm not going to be a, I'm not going to regret not doing the dishes or making that meal when I will regret not making the most of the cuddles with her. Yeah.
Liz Clifton: Yeah. Give her a cuddle from us too.
Kate Rives Rodney: I will.
Liz Clifton: Well, you have been amazing. Thank you so much for sharing everything. Hugely, hugely appreciate it.
Kate Rives Rodney: Very happy to share any, any, I mean, that's the thing you don't realize quite how many tips you accumulate on a personal development day, but yeah, if anyone's ever, you know, wants to know more about miracle morning or as another thing that we do as a team, which is cool, the Zen den, when we once on every son, one Sunday in a month. We go or we need to, just work it out. But we kind of do a redo when we do a movement and an, a facial and a meditation. Sorry, just going to tell my husband to go and get her quickly. Yeah, exactly. It's, you know, just a bit all over the place at the moment the mother-in-law left and but yeah, so, there, there are fun things like that or if anyone's ever wanting to kind of, yeah. Chat about going toxin-free or, you know, helping the environment or switching to a cleaner brand, you know, cruelty and vegan as well, plant based then I'd love to help more people out. Or if they just want to, you know, find out, get more tips or chat more, you know, I'm always free.
Liz Clifton: That's perfect. Thank you so much. And I'll obviously put all your links and everything underneath, so people know how to get in touch with you. Thank you so much. And yeah, go see that beautiful, babe.
Kate Rives Rodney: Sorry I've got to dash. It's been lovely.
Liz Clifton: Oh no, it's perfect. Thank you.